Sincerely, Amy Lee

At the close of each year and the beginning I spend some time reflecting and praying on what’s in store for me and what I feel I should focus on in the year to come. It’s a little different than a resolution. Each year I feel like God gives me a word for the coming year. A word to live by, to grow into, or to remind myself of when it’s needed. They have been pretty spot on the past several years. I even spoke about them as a guest speaker at a women’s conference this year.

Starting with 2020, my words have been freedom, redeemed, joy, and most recently, shine for 2023.

In short, in the past few years I’ve broken free, found redemption for heartache, trials, and circumstance, and moved into a place of overwhelming joy. My, oh my, how I have grown and become a fierce and joyfully strong woman. Several years ago I was in a broken place and had to find myself again. I had to remember that I am quite smart, funny, and worthy of great things. I also had to remember simple things. Like what kind of music or movies I liked.

I remember.

At the beginning of 2023 I felt overwhelmingly that my word was supposed to be shine.

I had big ideas, big goals, and wanted to use my experiences as well as my gifts not only for my personal growth, but also felt passionately that it was time to use them to help and speak into others lives. I felt it was time to shine. Not just for me, but to do as Matthew 5:16 states.

”let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven“ Matthew 5:16 ESV

The first several months of 2023 were pretty great. I finished two more half marathons, and was really growing into myself professionally as a Marketing and Communications Manager. I also had an absolutely incredible opportunity to speak to a large group at a Women’s Conference. I was able to share much of my story. The hardships, the grief, the trials, and also the redemption, the joy, and how I am ready to shine. I ended with an encouragement and call to action for others to use their own personal stories and allow themselves to shine and use their gifts and talents for good.

And then, 2023 knocked me flat.

Things that should have happened didn’t. People came and people went. I took a bold, courageous step and it didn’t work out. But I’m also glad I did. I have no regrets now.

Thankfully there were wonderful times woven into the mix. Like being a race announcer at two races. A trip to Washington DC with friends, and the beauties of motherhood.

And then there was this. The heartbreak of my year.

I was told to fight for a promotion with everything I’ve got. At the job I loved. Told to prove myself by my new leaders. And I did. I fought. And it was exhausting. Told to be more direct, and then to “be more bubbly”. Told I was too competitive even though I was told to fight. Told to be emotional. Broken until I cried. And when I cried, was told, “I hope to see you cry more.” The stress wore on me mentally and physically. Ghastly behavior. It’s still hard to comprehend.

And so I quit. The day of my second interview.

You see, as luck… or miracles would have it… I accepted a new offer the day before from an exciting company.

Through that six months, I realized that shine 2023 meant something different entirely.

It meant that no matter what comes my way, that I have the ability and the strength within to shine. That no matter whoever or whatever tries to snuff out my light, they will be powerless. My light shines brightly. Because of my faith. Because of who I’m built to be. And because of who I know I’m supposed to be.

2023 has been tough. But even though it feels like people have tried to turn out the lights, and at times it’s felt lonely, my candle will continue shine even when it’s dark.

Shine on.

By the way… 2024’s word is wild. More on that later.